project number one- design and implement a "neanderthal lifestyle magazine" for sale on a cross
                                 country tour
                                  neanderthals knew how to live without electricty.
                          i lived without hot water for years because of those assholes at philadelphia gas co.
                            project started  here www.delusionalneanderthal.blogspot.com

project number two- write the next chapter-

number three- update gambling page..more and more i feel the best thing i can do with cash                                 is to pile it on a poker table and defend it or grow it,  if i have to get a job i will
                       id rather my job was investments in myself and others........

do i have any goods to declare?
yes, my intellectual property
what i spent my life doing for the same boss
for all those months
conforming to a system
being the go to guy

i have levels of bullshit that no-one has ever seen
i have the delusional certainty of a drunken frat boy doing his first line of blow and telling you haw much he loves you maaan but its his blow and you want another line and thats why you dont do blow because people who do rapidly find themsleves surrounded by idiots
it weeds out a certain sort of person too
more about that later...
.
i am trained at getting and seeking attention buti have never  never prostituted myself before or ever so thouroughlay and completely.....but i will doi it for a year and in that year find twelve business partners and start twelve businesses? 

i will be on permanent working vacation.....
i have the pikeville summer writers retreat to adminsiter......
the nova scotia winter tenting society to found
then the bit with the writers colony
if for some reason the business fails start again in the next country or town or whatever
pikeville on 1000 dollars a month
that will be the first project, the first business?  LLC?

ill have to hire my own apprentice? 
harry enters the micro loan business
harry makes a series of thousand dollar bets on himself...

maybe spend a month in mexico ?
a month at the jersey shore playing poker?
a month in your poker room
a month is long enough to get something started one would imagine.....
the hardest part is thinking it
the fun part will be doing it.....

i want to come in play one tournament a day in your poker room
and write about what else happend that month in that town

one rip snorting drunken spectacle a week

until the mayan apocalypse that is.......

this summer in parties
today is the last night i  will drink as a spectator
anytime you see me with a drink in my hand its because someone bought it for me
ive bought my last beer for myself
let me buy you one tho.....
just remember me when happy hour is over
thats the only time i buy drinks because im a notoriously cheap bastard
but im a good tipper
people generally enjoy my rip
2012 party like its the mayan apocalypse

just in case its the mayan apocalyse
get over here and slip your hips up to my lips

as the official life of the party
       here is my schedule for drinking this summer

2NITE - steve on point

AUGUST- ???????
live blog from keiths where he pairs food to my drink of choice, moonshine
looking for a moonshine sponsor for that one
or maybe he just wants to cater the after party on the beach
what beach?
lets figure that out next......

AUGUST 19 ---black tie event black landlord audience participation party parrticipant (fundraising) 

                                 so we have a coiuple beers at a couple places for a good cause
                       we go to a few happy hours on the way to the rock and roll show for charity
                we raise money along the way...we invite the roller girls and the womens rugby teams
                       

LABOR DAY-----day at the FABULOUS SHAMROCK for halfball, a day load, asian pirate porn, actual pirates, awesome dudes printing party? 

SEPT 13th i turn 49 and rent the gunclub grounds for a rain or shine concert on an odd day  of the week with rumors of camping and a country breakfast irish coffee contest the next morning
country tofu scramble anyone?    this is a special two day bender for me and the predlude to a three day bender around halloween and a 2 day on 2 day off bender for the duration of my welcome in portland

october launch plans to buy bus, convert to french fry oil travel the country on french fry oil offering tasty vegan treats to people all across the land......i think my boys at the grindcore house will be throwing a party that day.....

NOVEMBER- portland  BIZARRO publishing convention featuring the dramatic stage debut of twenty guys trying to be bukowski elimimated one by one in an internet reality show with registered voting centers all across the land....we will sell these official party sites to anyone that wants to blow up a certain website that day with traffic  who wants to get a few million drunken eyeballs on my webcast?  no poker strat in this webcast...bbv live...in your town....thats my income stream...poker tournaments, teeshirts, poker games where people can try to take ten percent of my net worth, whatever that is, up to 100 k because i will never have a penny more than 100 k net worth by choice and would rather ghandi myself out of the rat race by being the interesting person at the poker game,
 the bizarro partydebut of 20 assholes pretending to be drunkenly  channelling  charles bukowski internet freakshow would be greater with the addition of
with dennis capparicio as karate bukowski, bakeowski, the charles bukowski blues project......maybe an appearance by other surprise east coast friends.....

who wants to hire a legendary drunk to turn his alcoholism into money by staging fabulous parties once a month

you can smell it in the air
read about starving irish in the 1800's and think about africa
they dont really care if some poor people starve, or lose electricity
get up
turn off a light
i just saved a few drops of oil
or a few radioactive nanoseconds of halflife......
the world just thanked me
i just thanked the world back!

we feed out cows better than they feed their people
im sure they would rather eat dogfood than your dog
send dog food to africa campaign
drop bags by parachute into refugee camps

you can smell it in the air
theyd like to pull the plug on us somewhere
is it the mayan apocalpyse? who knows but welcome it into the world!

the internet now contains enough data to end this experiment

weve discovered that all the good thoughts have already been thunk

all the cool songs have already been writ
i wrote a cool song 25 years ago when rachel goldstein broke my heart
that was the last time i think
now its unbreakable
brenda did a number
whoops
they all did
but it got me to the point i am at now which is right on the edge
that delicate place where i can teeter
like sliding down a suprisingly slippery wet metal roof
note to self
plan better star watchin locations....
GO ANnn ONYMUS!
you are the only thing keeping this world from squeezing us like a boa constrictor
there are too many free thinkers roaming around out there
too much access to information
information that used to be kept secret from us by pricks in suits or body armor fascists trying to keep the rich people away from the poor people


GET ME OUT OF THIS PETRI DISH MR SCIENTIST!

Ive learned all about universal love and its power
oh
im supposed to talk about love for a few years
ill try
but no one reads my damn blog anyway
if i build it they will come

party starters dot com
what kinda party do you want to have?
plenty of spots open...........

so if my goal is to help women who need money for their organizations
how can i help the hot bartenders i know?
the hot bartender carwash picnic of course
see what your favorite local bartenders price is to wash your car to help charity
what charity?
i know these women who need a little money
they are really bar gangsters
they just want your moeny
so why not give some to a good cause
buy a tee shirt from a bartender
shell sell you the shirt off her back  if the price is right....
help her charity out!

ok im really cooking now!

lots of great sounding ideas coming from the life remix
re-re-re-re-re-re
i say/ isuh suh say
REMIX
time to take it to the next level
loafing done right
i offer four hours of labor six days a week
i can do a number of things
ill start my own list
harry's list
you tell me what you need help with
ill tell you how i think me sleeping on your couch for a week can fix it
at the end of a week you will either invite me for anouther week or we will part friends
if the jobs bigger than 30 hours we will talk about a more permanent thing

harry services, how can i direct your call?
he with another client now, leave a message on his blog
hes playing poker he will call you at the break
hes in the middle of something

harry in the middle

put me in the middle of a mess
it will be neater when i leave

i will combine the concept of my first and last tour
hitchhike the states?
hawaii by frieghter as a deckhand
loop south thru florida walking the appalachian trail....

do the south/walk thru the desert might be fun, sure its been done before
arrange rides on craigslist
the craigslist vacation...needed ride to......thats all
as soon as you get into one town put up a posting for a ride to the next town.....

solve a problem in each town, move on....
like the lone ranger
a modern day lone ranger
also johnny cannibis seed idea
get the right hybrrid seed
plant it everywhere

something insanely seedy

air filled with sulfer
motionless zombies look to the heavens for more fire
thick humid smoky air
the skies explode
happy birthday america
i headed to the car, away for the hellish scene behind me
each step bringing fresher air
each step an improvement

fireworks again last night
the local bike club filled the air 2 valleys over
window rattling explosions can change your plans in a hurry
patriotism ruined my love life last night
if it keeps happening i may have to take some measures....

i know what love feels like again and for that i am grateful to the universe
the rest is just patience and focus
i will continue to focus on love when its right in front of me
and to smile about it when patriotism is ruining it
is my smile rueful ?
maybe a little
but this love creek i drink from is filled with the most delicious water
so im going to keep drinking
and keep changing
and see what i turn into

the sun tells me this is how men and women should live
im listening
the sun has a lot of good ideas

the lover peeks out from under the drawbridge
at first sight, thats alotta troll
a shaggy beast of love
you can see the love if you really look into his eyes
they are still alive with mirth
secretly laughing at an unfunny world
unable, unxilling to put a leash on my joy

in this world we apologize to each other for being happy
sorry for my good mood
whats wrong with her face?
 her eyes they twinkle, her laugh so hearty......

sorry to lower your misery index
if u focus on shit thats what your life is
a shit examiner
thats not my style says harry
strike three the umpire said

ive had all the chances in the world
now its time to just do me
be the best harry i can be
unfettered by the shackles of employment

im the virtual buddha baybee
ill travel the world with my message of love
love is the answer

so the troll pulls his body up from the gulch
using the bridge as a pull up bar, then
 groaning,
 heave-ing one tree trunk thigh up on top of the bank
then the other

deeming it safe to sniff at the air ontop of the bridge
he takes a double nostril full
love was just here!
the faint traces of the sweetest scent of the lands fairest maiden

heavy troll feet become instantly lighter
intoxicated again
he sings a little song
changes the lyrics to show HER influence
and this is from just a whiff

thats why the troll was down there with only the three billy goats gruff for company
commenting to each other about the loveliness on the bridge
afraid to look up, afraid to scare her away with their aching desire

they do a morning mysogenistic radio show from under a bridge
picking a new bridge in a new place
fiding the sexiest bridge in the city
doing a live show from time to time at a strip club
or a golf outing
my job is to bring a van full of smiling dancing women
(who also are poker dealers, bartenders, etc.)

BRING ON THE DANCING GIRLS!
 so five minutes and one cuppa coffee later im starting my new biz

bring on the dancing girls!
im the chafffuer master of ceremonies karoke legend bowling champion dart thrower rugby player
renaissance man
i will bring the party to your place
let my party experts design your perfect time

ill buy a van-
fill it with the makings of a party....
then start doing epic parties
epic party dot com would be SOOO  epic that it would be awesome
yeah talk like the tv..
.talk like a ten yeat old
what are the themes and concepts driving the thinking in this country
demystifying the media
its about access to your kids brains
its about tastemaking

dumpster diving superheros

princesses and vampires and hello kitty and my pretty pony
football and nascar and robots and gardening?

yeah thats the service i provide to the schools////

what is the average ten year olds idea of conversation?

i sense the wall,
i know its back there
as i slowly back towards the door
myself hostage to the world
about to put myself back in the work pool
thats my threat to the world
as i slowly back up
hoping theres a door behind me

nobody move!
no funny busines!s
or ill send out a resume!
i mean it
i really will
with references and recent work history and everything
dont make me do it
just keep calm

made some extra special corn muffins
they are like a time bomb
eat and wait
eat and eat = higher than shit'!

one day of dragon shit
draggin thru shit
the good thing is it used to last months
i may be a little slower today but im going to be back on track
depression or liberation
that is the question
it seems that i chose to wallow yesterday
today i choose to build

i had to get to get lost to find myself
driving thru the country hills
thinking my citified sense of direction would serve me in the boondocks
driving in a nearly perfect circle
i kept seeing a sign that said lobachsville 3
ten minutes later its sill three miles to my left
i began to think it was time to ask for directions
i stop and find out that im 15 miles off course
this time lobachsville is on my right

sometimes you have to get really, really lost to find yourself
i got carried away by a huge wave
the kind that violently somersaults one in the surging surf
gasping for air you try to swim out of waves that are half air
breath shortening you gasp and catch a lungfull of brine
retching now you gasp again and find sweet sweet air
the sea has subsided
you are thirty yards off the coast of lobachsville
but you can finally see it
you can finally paddle with a purpose
paddle with a destination in sight

i once was lost
now im found
lost in the morass of the capitalist nightmare
lost in a vast sea of greed
the general consensus is that you must barter your freedom
that you HAVE to work
because you HAVE to pay rent to live
to pay for the lights
to pay for your foodstuffs
to pay the french translator of you blog a princely sum so that she selects just the right word en francais that means "foodstuffs"  and not "commestibles"

i was lost at a poker table
love was in my kitchen
i was playing cards
when love came to call i was sitting at a table full of men
trying to take their hardearned bloodmoney
olde west stye
i was doc holliday
venus was at my kuchen table enjoying a banana martini
becoming irritated with me and my choices

i was lost
my prioritites were out of whack
i need to be available to venus
thats why im here on this earth
to be available to love when she calls
what kind of moron puts money before love?
that kind of thinking has you dieing alone in a bed
a bed with a matress stuffed with cash
id prefer my matress to be saturated with her sweat
my sweat
the sweet smoothie of our souls
together for moments
together forever
creating a love energy that is visible from space
recent satellite pictures indicate a hurricane of love emerging two miles to the left of lobachsville pennsylvania
residents are urged to take the neccessary precautions
put a bucket out and catch some of the torrential love showers that are forecast for the next thirty to forty years
get your heart kites out for the hundred mile and hour lovewinds
this system will be centered there
two miles to the left of lobachsville
for the forseeable future

time to reassess my gifts
the greatest gift this summer is the sudden gift of time
how do i spend it?
you know there is a finite end to the cash
then a job becomes part of the game
i can chill-ax for at least 2-3 months
and then there may be a huge pop
of i may have to create my own huge pop
get something together already wordwise
i know this is the 392nd time i swore i was going to ficus on my writing
but i mean it this time
its practically independence day
am i independent
i am until sept-oct if i streeeeeeeettcch it
as it stands now
i will count the chickens when they hatch
so now i got to be in miser mode
drinking is for people with jobs and stress
i have neither
i have fresh air
THANK U TREEZ!
i have a taste of love
THANK U SUN!
i got a few buck saved
THANK U FRIENDS WITH JOBS 4 ME!

i dont want to have to ask again
and im running thru all my friends
i know we both mean well in the beginning....
(continuing this friend riff on work 4 suckers blog!)