the idea is to print up alotta words cheaply and sell them face to face
something to read on the shitter or on the bus
something that recognises thoughts are fleeting and there are always more to come
ive got to round up 600 bucks to make this happen
and polish up some of the prose
i sure cant be selling "poetry" like the two under this post and get away with it
i need some meaty prose
the poetry experiment sounds like a summer thing
that will be june or something
time to stop talking about it and wrestle with the prose....
a grand wrestling match,
as i've never written an unintersting word in my life
my typing errors are better reading than most blogs
i gotta find six suckers to support the arts
100 bucks a sucker
so if you are a sucker
leave a comment at the bottom of this post and say HEY , SURE, you dont sound crazy at all mr scribbler of the blogs
what does the hundo get you?
A FRONT ROW TICKET TO THE INSANITY
every piece of output from here on down the line
free admission to live events
ill host an event for you
make you and me some cash somehow...
i met an event planner at the solstice bonfire
that frees me to commodify my ass
build some value to the entertainment franchise that is bakeowski industires
Monday, December 27, 2010
Sunday, December 26, 2010
its a blizzard and its time to do these shrooms ive been saving
a killer at the bar told me i looked like a viking
plotting to burn english monastaries
i was just sitting there
being me
the killer had to testify or go to jail
about the warcrimes he committed
so i guess he knows looks
they gave him the option
prison
or testify
they said thanks for you testimony
no benefits for you
just following orders dint work in the late 40's
it dint work in the 70's
thanks 4 your service
a killer at the bar told me i looked like a viking
plotting to burn english monastaries
i was just sitting there
being me
the killer had to testify or go to jail
about the warcrimes he committed
so i guess he knows looks
they gave him the option
prison
or testify
they said thanks for you testimony
no benefits for you
just following orders dint work in the late 40's
it dint work in the 70's
thanks 4 your service
Friday, December 17, 2010
the squirrel is frozen in flight
and frozen solid
a third of the way across the street
was he almost there?
or not even half way
his everflattening corspe is enigmatic
the road climbs where he sought his last nut
just a short dash across
and into the woods
hes a comet this afternoon
an ice tail has formed which reflects the sun
a brilliant glowing squirrel sicle
in life he was a pest who skittered in the crawlspace
a squirrel terrorist
who may or may not be chewing electric wires
risking barnfire
now he's art
his menace transformed into a glittering testament
rodent messiah
doomed to die epically
the headlines read
"Miraculous weeping Mary seen in ice formed by squirrel corpse, road closed until thaw"
and frozen solid
a third of the way across the street
was he almost there?
or not even half way
his everflattening corspe is enigmatic
the road climbs where he sought his last nut
just a short dash across
and into the woods
hes a comet this afternoon
an ice tail has formed which reflects the sun
a brilliant glowing squirrel sicle
in life he was a pest who skittered in the crawlspace
a squirrel terrorist
who may or may not be chewing electric wires
risking barnfire
now he's art
his menace transformed into a glittering testament
rodent messiah
doomed to die epically
the headlines read
"Miraculous weeping Mary seen in ice formed by squirrel corpse, road closed until thaw"
Monday, December 13, 2010
Why is this the World's most Important Bog?
This is the world's most important blog because I can predict the futre. Fr example. Soon the conservative pundits will be all over Obama attacking him on his now secret, but soon to be revealed plan to make Medical Marijuana a big part of his health care plan.
BUT THATS NOT ALL......
The best way to fight the Al Queda would be to take thier funding away. They b uy their munitions and arm thier fanatic through the exploitation of our drug culture and the insane amounts of filthy lucre generated by this illegal trade.
Destroying them is SIMPLICITY ITSELF.
Grow poppies in the unwatered yet fertile fields of California. The soil has to be better than the soil in Afghanistan. Become the Number one Exporter of Opium in the world. China did it to us by way of England running the world. Now it's our turn, USA USA USA.
Next, use illegal immigrants that want to become legal to harvest the opium from the fields. Call them "patriots in training" and after they have served five years in the fields, grant them citizenship.....With monthly drug tests of course, we don't want to encourage junqies.....Scandanavia has alot less problems with hard-core druggies because they treat theis sicko's instead of imprisoning them......
The announcement that Obama is going to legalize pot will not be made until he has been re-elected. It makes sense. The country isn't ready for it yet and the howls of the dying conservative culture are still listened too in the less enlightened or more scareder of mixed racial heritage parts of the country and there are alot of them. What needs to happen is to send troubled inner city youth ou to areas of fresh air in an exchange program of sorts. Partner them with rural schools and the rural schools can send all their idealist dreamer types who just want to "help the poor". In this way there will be more mixed race children and everyone can get over it already. I suggest boffing someone as far from your color spectrum as you can so within a few generations we are all a sort of pleasing mocha latte'
Ok...
So racism is fixed, the drug problem is fixed, now we focus on crime.
Bring back the days of the old west, where all the tuff guys had side arms. there were alot less assholes in the west because assholes got bushwhacked. We are way over the carrying capacity of this planet already. We need to remove a few billion to be sustainable. this is a small and crucial first step.
Now can you see why this is the worlds most important blog? I thought so. I'm expecting a call anyday from the president to help implement these programs, but until then You can help me keep the creative juices percolating by donating to me when you see me. no amount is to large, or small. See, now i Gotta run and serve drinks to the rich and I may never be on this thought train again!!!! Thats why it is so crucial that I spend more time BEING THE NATIONS THINKTANK and less time asking "do you want a lime in that?"
send postal money orders to Harry Baker 321 reed st phila pa 19147 and thankyou for being part of the most imprtant blog in the world message of global harmony and love.
i love you guys...thats why im taking over the thinking for ya'll.
and if obama doesnt get it done i guess ill just have to run for president.
peace
This is the world's most important blog because I can predict the futre. Fr example. Soon the conservative pundits will be all over Obama attacking him on his now secret, but soon to be revealed plan to make Medical Marijuana a big part of his health care plan.
BUT THATS NOT ALL......
The best way to fight the Al Queda would be to take thier funding away. They b uy their munitions and arm thier fanatic through the exploitation of our drug culture and the insane amounts of filthy lucre generated by this illegal trade.
Destroying them is SIMPLICITY ITSELF.
Grow poppies in the unwatered yet fertile fields of California. The soil has to be better than the soil in Afghanistan. Become the Number one Exporter of Opium in the world. China did it to us by way of England running the world. Now it's our turn, USA USA USA.
Next, use illegal immigrants that want to become legal to harvest the opium from the fields. Call them "patriots in training" and after they have served five years in the fields, grant them citizenship.....With monthly drug tests of course, we don't want to encourage junqies.....Scandanavia has alot less problems with hard-core druggies because they treat theis sicko's instead of imprisoning them......
The announcement that Obama is going to legalize pot will not be made until he has been re-elected. It makes sense. The country isn't ready for it yet and the howls of the dying conservative culture are still listened too in the less enlightened or more scareder of mixed racial heritage parts of the country and there are alot of them. What needs to happen is to send troubled inner city youth ou to areas of fresh air in an exchange program of sorts. Partner them with rural schools and the rural schools can send all their idealist dreamer types who just want to "help the poor". In this way there will be more mixed race children and everyone can get over it already. I suggest boffing someone as far from your color spectrum as you can so within a few generations we are all a sort of pleasing mocha latte'
Ok...
So racism is fixed, the drug problem is fixed, now we focus on crime.
Bring back the days of the old west, where all the tuff guys had side arms. there were alot less assholes in the west because assholes got bushwhacked. We are way over the carrying capacity of this planet already. We need to remove a few billion to be sustainable. this is a small and crucial first step.
Now can you see why this is the worlds most important blog? I thought so. I'm expecting a call anyday from the president to help implement these programs, but until then You can help me keep the creative juices percolating by donating to me when you see me. no amount is to large, or small. See, now i Gotta run and serve drinks to the rich and I may never be on this thought train again!!!! Thats why it is so crucial that I spend more time BEING THE NATIONS THINKTANK and less time asking "do you want a lime in that?"
send postal money orders to Harry Baker 321 reed st phila pa 19147 and thankyou for being part of the most imprtant blog in the world message of global harmony and love.
i love you guys...thats why im taking over the thinking for ya'll.
and if obama doesnt get it done i guess ill just have to run for president.
peace
I am embracing the creative energy which is surrounding me, and in truth it is a crazed energy, crackling, unpredictable, sparky. I don't know where I will wind up but this is where it started. I now have lyrics flooding my cranium, lyrics with an inflection and and meter, ready for the next time. As I walk the street Im swaying to the beat, but the beat is not coming out of a walkman or ipod, it's coming from some words that I'm tring to get to play nice together, in my head for their eventual release out into the world.
you words behave now....im not playing....get into that meter right now you hear me?
If you see me in the middle of the street, hands bopping out an invisible beat, it's not that I have gone all the way over the edge and am begging for change or washing windows to support my crack habit....thats years away, I may never explore that at all if I keep getting interesting ideas in my head like I've been getting lately.
And I think it's the same source that surfers talk about when they get all misty and it's the shit thats out there in the air waiting to turn into music, the cosmic vibe man, and maybe I am going crazy but at least im enjoying the ride. If you check the dates of my supremely weirdest blogs its on the same days as violent sunspot activity...im just doing what the sun god tells me to...in secret coded transmissons hidden in sun spots.
....so when a famous writer says "hell is other people", he is a genius, so witty and droll..i violently paraphrase the man and people leave the room saying "I can't listen to you when you are like this?" I may have given a little more detail about how to handle said hell and maybe giving explict examples was over the top but someone has to make the tough decisions...
you words behave now....im not playing....get into that meter right now you hear me?
If you see me in the middle of the street, hands bopping out an invisible beat, it's not that I have gone all the way over the edge and am begging for change or washing windows to support my crack habit....thats years away, I may never explore that at all if I keep getting interesting ideas in my head like I've been getting lately.
And I think it's the same source that surfers talk about when they get all misty and it's the shit thats out there in the air waiting to turn into music, the cosmic vibe man, and maybe I am going crazy but at least im enjoying the ride. If you check the dates of my supremely weirdest blogs its on the same days as violent sunspot activity...im just doing what the sun god tells me to...in secret coded transmissons hidden in sun spots.
....so when a famous writer says "hell is other people", he is a genius, so witty and droll..i violently paraphrase the man and people leave the room saying "I can't listen to you when you are like this?" I may have given a little more detail about how to handle said hell and maybe giving explict examples was over the top but someone has to make the tough decisions...
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Big, big things are happening in my mental environment these days and it's a very exciting time to be me. I'm dedicateing 2011 to being the me i was meant to be which is equal parts clown, entertainer, lyricist, and most of all friend of the earth. Im gonna hang out with the most creative and talented people who will tolerate me and see what kind of magic happens, find a groove or two.
I found a groove the other day with two very talented dudes and we recorded some shit and it was the most fun i've had with my clothes on in a hen's age. the positive energy was a welcome addition and im going to pursue as much of that as i can stand in the coming year.
This song is the my personal anthem for 2011.
I FEEL LIKE LETTING MY FREAK FLAG FLY!
I will not give in to the paranoia, and I will not fulfill some capitalists wet dream of what a bartender looks like by cutting my hair for his catering company. I'll probably put it in a ponytail just to keep the money cow producing milk and try to keep my sharpest ironic observations about the way he runs his business to myself because im paid to pore drinks and be polite and thats something i can manage to do six hour at a time every now and then....
hello...helpful hippy enterprises
how can i direct your call?
we can do that
how many heads do you need for the job?
book it
I found a groove the other day with two very talented dudes and we recorded some shit and it was the most fun i've had with my clothes on in a hen's age. the positive energy was a welcome addition and im going to pursue as much of that as i can stand in the coming year.
This song is the my personal anthem for 2011.
I FEEL LIKE LETTING MY FREAK FLAG FLY!
I will not give in to the paranoia, and I will not fulfill some capitalists wet dream of what a bartender looks like by cutting my hair for his catering company. I'll probably put it in a ponytail just to keep the money cow producing milk and try to keep my sharpest ironic observations about the way he runs his business to myself because im paid to pore drinks and be polite and thats something i can manage to do six hour at a time every now and then....
hello...helpful hippy enterprises
how can i direct your call?
we can do that
how many heads do you need for the job?
book it
Sunday, December 5, 2010
I hereby officially announce my pre-candidacy for Times Man of the Year, 2011. I'm going to grow into my cherished national icon staus slowly. grow into it. i started this blog crap out not capitalizing any but the last letters of a sentence, right before the period. i got tired of capitalizing even in this highly amussing way as i felt it slowed down my flow, my thought streams that the nation has come to cherish as they wades in my thoughts and cleanse themselves.
I didn't capitalize as a protest towards my lack of Capitol. I was sticking it to the man as I worked an incredible arrya of shit jobs for money. That's the name of my work advice website that I plan to start on as soon as I finish up here at THE WORLDS MOST IMPOTANT BLOG. (now with hints of editing at the beginning of the thoughtstreams)(then i tend to drift)
It's important to me to transcribe as faithfully as possible where this muse is floating me on these thoughstreams. Streams of hope and a potential future, much different from the angry rugby players bitter words of heartache. after all the waters are attracting an ever growing wading party. im working on buying a bus so we can update the merry pranksters...
so i started this song about the wading party
and ill start that first few chapters of that project when the muse sings those melodies to me
im thinking old time with banjos and maybe my neices violin
i need a violinists
we have a couple guitarists
maybe ill try the banjo out
soo i start this song with the intention of other musicians adding verses
once the chorus is woked out that is
i wrote this song about it
just need a few musicians to work out the arrangement with
"come to the wading party,
were hanging at the creek
come to the wading party
it lasts about a week.
strong coffee kills the hangovers
its usually on by five,
theres work to do 'fore wading
and naps to sneak off to..."
ok so the song is started
maybe i should write a song a day too
its not scatterbrained if it evolves into something
i made ZOMBIe BUKOWSKI happen didnt I?
ive left footprints
evidence of insanity
evidence which i should print up and present to the nice people at social security so i can live the dream of liing in the greatest welfare state the world has ever known
let some republicans buy my beer for me
they like that shit
republicans
yeah ill refer to it as my genius grant in better company
and laff about sticking it to the man when im hanging with the anarchists
this will be a year of productivity and what i am producing is merchandise baby
to sell..ill put it on ebay, each item attatched to an artifact
like the first item up for bids
a beer bottle full of delusional poetry
i have a notebook the i wrote in and see if you can tell when the exactly i turned schizophrenic when i wrote these poems because they really seem to be coming from two distinctly deranged people who from time to time take up a pen and write ....
some of these poems are in small notepads, ill rip some fresh raw poetry out of AN ACTUAL POETS ORIGINAL NOTEBOOKS and you can fetishize it however you please...
wait for my line of collectible wearable poetry clothing ill sew the TWIMB LOGO INTO EACH GARMET by hand and it will be accompanied by a thankyou poem called thanks for buying my shirt, gee
its a hip hop number
OLD SCHOOL
thanks for buying my shirt gee
pockets are empty of my dough man
i ride thru the ghetto on the trollies
enduirng racial atrocities
because im the man that tried to teach little nigger kids their mother fucking ABCS
yeah I said it
got to give myself a tiny bit of credit
not alot of people have earned the right to said it
so you tell me
tee shirt buying gee
i did ten years with kids their fathers couldnt fucking stand
smart mouth punk ass always tearing up my class
i play rugby bitch
meaner than a snake
but those ghetto ass kids gave me more than i could take
urban terroists second to none
but one on one they all run pussy run
you ever try to keep 30 after school?
IM MR RUGBY a physical fool
i held back thirty till the one kid grabbed the door
i put my feet in the doorway and wedged my elbow in
and thity motherfuckser started bum rushing me
i held the fuckers back
but no one had my back
i had to let them out when the girls ribs started to crack
she was in the front
they crushed her into me
then the fucking principal started yelling at me
so yeah you heard the fucking word i said
in the belly of the beast
that my life was a waking nightmare
didnt bother me the least
i had mighty things to do and was strong as a beast
now i sit here and gotta take some shit on trollies
please
your thoughts are a disease
in the belly of a beast
named for some old racial hero to inspire these twisted freaks
twisted freaks
twisted freaks
they super freaky YOW
thats gotta be worth at least a case of beer there
thats art right there
i gotta find a way to market it to millions of republicans children
get back at the man by subverting the minds of his children through my new series of childrens books that baldy mis state the accepted facts of the day
you think its bad your kids sing tupac lyrics?
wait until the fukker is singing bakeowski
I didn't capitalize as a protest towards my lack of Capitol. I was sticking it to the man as I worked an incredible arrya of shit jobs for money. That's the name of my work advice website that I plan to start on as soon as I finish up here at THE WORLDS MOST IMPOTANT BLOG. (now with hints of editing at the beginning of the thoughtstreams)(then i tend to drift)
It's important to me to transcribe as faithfully as possible where this muse is floating me on these thoughstreams. Streams of hope and a potential future, much different from the angry rugby players bitter words of heartache. after all the waters are attracting an ever growing wading party. im working on buying a bus so we can update the merry pranksters...
so i started this song about the wading party
and ill start that first few chapters of that project when the muse sings those melodies to me
im thinking old time with banjos and maybe my neices violin
i need a violinists
we have a couple guitarists
maybe ill try the banjo out
soo i start this song with the intention of other musicians adding verses
once the chorus is woked out that is
i wrote this song about it
just need a few musicians to work out the arrangement with
"come to the wading party,
were hanging at the creek
come to the wading party
it lasts about a week.
strong coffee kills the hangovers
its usually on by five,
theres work to do 'fore wading
and naps to sneak off to..."
ok so the song is started
maybe i should write a song a day too
its not scatterbrained if it evolves into something
i made ZOMBIe BUKOWSKI happen didnt I?
ive left footprints
evidence of insanity
evidence which i should print up and present to the nice people at social security so i can live the dream of liing in the greatest welfare state the world has ever known
let some republicans buy my beer for me
they like that shit
republicans
yeah ill refer to it as my genius grant in better company
and laff about sticking it to the man when im hanging with the anarchists
this will be a year of productivity and what i am producing is merchandise baby
to sell..ill put it on ebay, each item attatched to an artifact
like the first item up for bids
a beer bottle full of delusional poetry
i have a notebook the i wrote in and see if you can tell when the exactly i turned schizophrenic when i wrote these poems because they really seem to be coming from two distinctly deranged people who from time to time take up a pen and write ....
some of these poems are in small notepads, ill rip some fresh raw poetry out of AN ACTUAL POETS ORIGINAL NOTEBOOKS and you can fetishize it however you please...
wait for my line of collectible wearable poetry clothing ill sew the TWIMB LOGO INTO EACH GARMET by hand and it will be accompanied by a thankyou poem called thanks for buying my shirt, gee
its a hip hop number
OLD SCHOOL
thanks for buying my shirt gee
pockets are empty of my dough man
i ride thru the ghetto on the trollies
enduirng racial atrocities
because im the man that tried to teach little nigger kids their mother fucking ABCS
yeah I said it
got to give myself a tiny bit of credit
not alot of people have earned the right to said it
so you tell me
tee shirt buying gee
i did ten years with kids their fathers couldnt fucking stand
smart mouth punk ass always tearing up my class
i play rugby bitch
meaner than a snake
but those ghetto ass kids gave me more than i could take
urban terroists second to none
but one on one they all run pussy run
you ever try to keep 30 after school?
IM MR RUGBY a physical fool
i held back thirty till the one kid grabbed the door
i put my feet in the doorway and wedged my elbow in
and thity motherfuckser started bum rushing me
i held the fuckers back
but no one had my back
i had to let them out when the girls ribs started to crack
she was in the front
they crushed her into me
then the fucking principal started yelling at me
so yeah you heard the fucking word i said
in the belly of the beast
that my life was a waking nightmare
didnt bother me the least
i had mighty things to do and was strong as a beast
now i sit here and gotta take some shit on trollies
please
your thoughts are a disease
in the belly of a beast
named for some old racial hero to inspire these twisted freaks
twisted freaks
twisted freaks
they super freaky YOW
thats gotta be worth at least a case of beer there
thats art right there
i gotta find a way to market it to millions of republicans children
get back at the man by subverting the minds of his children through my new series of childrens books that baldy mis state the accepted facts of the day
you think its bad your kids sing tupac lyrics?
wait until the fukker is singing bakeowski
Saturday, December 4, 2010
its time for the percolator
its time for the percolator
are you ready for the percolator?
when the shits humming in my head like it is now life is a wonderful experience
alive with possibility
i cackle daily, madly, embracing the mania
the fun side of this mental moodswing machine
i also enjoy the dark and horrible thoughts when they come
at least i say i do.....thats my story and im sticking to it
i will not apologize for trying to sell my words, this is my job man, its what i do
so i googled the old band i used to semi stalk back in the ninties when i was a happening fella
a fella with a future
a big city school teacher with a car and a mortgage
nothing like some great music to get your head right music is my drug of choice, my fisrt option which is why i react so strongly to terrible music
terrible music, like bad acid, can ruin your day
june rich is the band and they have been defunct for more than a decade
but they did things right, hired three great musicians to back up the songbirds
turned them loose every now and then and the harmonies and lyrics really hit me where i live. they have one ditty about not getting out of bed, "dont ring my bell,...dont call my phone" there isnt gona be an answer... where the day starts out and she calls out of work and another great one about honey.
I stopped drinking about eleven thirty as someone had to drive the band back to Philly from Pittsburg. I danced alot of the booze out and slugged back some gas station coffee and was good to go. The songbirds were tired from the show and went right out as soon as we hit the highway. The boys in the band didnt last much longer and it was me, some tunes and the highway. The Allman Brothers made some damn fine travelling music and soon I was testing the limits of the bands brand new van. It's mostly downhill from Pittsburg to Philly and I gave her all the gas she would take. The middle of the night is the perfect time for this and it soon took on aspects of a video game whose goal is to keep the speedometer needle pinned and avoid the red lights of other night travellers.
Aerodynamically the van shares many properties with a cinder block. Cinderblocks take their time when changing directions. The van liked to take turns a little wider than the lines would allow, but we mostly stayed off the shoulder. the shoulder is bad news at the rate of speed we were travelling, but cinderblocks are notoriously stubborn, inertiawise. The gravel pops up and you start a little slide and you could be at the bottom of the mountain for days before they find you. But I had god on my side and it was not our time to make peace with the maker. In high speed driving you really should make your intentions clear to the other tired middle of the night drivers. You definitely don't want to surprise a drunk and deal with his issues as well as your own so a real key is making your intentions clear and obvious. Like a comet we whooshed our way homewards. Soon it was a race with the sun.
It's important to have goals. The reddening sky ahead gave me an obvious mark to shoot for. People say the trip takes 5 hours if you aren't afraid of getting a speeding ticket but we were looking at 3 and a half. Reckless? Wreckless. I was in a driving zone unlike any other. I was the pilot of a shuttlecraft dodging through an asteroid field pursued by Romulans with bad intentions. Sometimes you just know that you co-piolt is a diety of some sort and that nothing bad will happen to you in their halo of joy and lightness. We were all to pretty to die. Except for lead guitarist, Mr. Allan James, his looks are an acquired taste. Its due to the intense concentration he brings to his craft. He is chaneling fsome next level muses up there and they use him up and ride him hard but its worth it when he manuvers that skateboard full of swithches and cables with his foot while the magic pours out of the speakers. And the songbirds are clearly some gods choir and he wasn't ready to take them back just yet to whatever universe of harmony they came from.
I was clearly and instrument of someones master plan that night
its time for the percolator
are you ready for the percolator?
when the shits humming in my head like it is now life is a wonderful experience
alive with possibility
i cackle daily, madly, embracing the mania
the fun side of this mental moodswing machine
i also enjoy the dark and horrible thoughts when they come
at least i say i do.....thats my story and im sticking to it
i will not apologize for trying to sell my words, this is my job man, its what i do
so i googled the old band i used to semi stalk back in the ninties when i was a happening fella
a fella with a future
a big city school teacher with a car and a mortgage
nothing like some great music to get your head right music is my drug of choice, my fisrt option which is why i react so strongly to terrible music
terrible music, like bad acid, can ruin your day
june rich is the band and they have been defunct for more than a decade
but they did things right, hired three great musicians to back up the songbirds
turned them loose every now and then and the harmonies and lyrics really hit me where i live. they have one ditty about not getting out of bed, "dont ring my bell,...dont call my phone" there isnt gona be an answer... where the day starts out and she calls out of work and another great one about honey.
I stopped drinking about eleven thirty as someone had to drive the band back to Philly from Pittsburg. I danced alot of the booze out and slugged back some gas station coffee and was good to go. The songbirds were tired from the show and went right out as soon as we hit the highway. The boys in the band didnt last much longer and it was me, some tunes and the highway. The Allman Brothers made some damn fine travelling music and soon I was testing the limits of the bands brand new van. It's mostly downhill from Pittsburg to Philly and I gave her all the gas she would take. The middle of the night is the perfect time for this and it soon took on aspects of a video game whose goal is to keep the speedometer needle pinned and avoid the red lights of other night travellers.
Aerodynamically the van shares many properties with a cinder block. Cinderblocks take their time when changing directions. The van liked to take turns a little wider than the lines would allow, but we mostly stayed off the shoulder. the shoulder is bad news at the rate of speed we were travelling, but cinderblocks are notoriously stubborn, inertiawise. The gravel pops up and you start a little slide and you could be at the bottom of the mountain for days before they find you. But I had god on my side and it was not our time to make peace with the maker. In high speed driving you really should make your intentions clear to the other tired middle of the night drivers. You definitely don't want to surprise a drunk and deal with his issues as well as your own so a real key is making your intentions clear and obvious. Like a comet we whooshed our way homewards. Soon it was a race with the sun.
It's important to have goals. The reddening sky ahead gave me an obvious mark to shoot for. People say the trip takes 5 hours if you aren't afraid of getting a speeding ticket but we were looking at 3 and a half. Reckless? Wreckless. I was in a driving zone unlike any other. I was the pilot of a shuttlecraft dodging through an asteroid field pursued by Romulans with bad intentions. Sometimes you just know that you co-piolt is a diety of some sort and that nothing bad will happen to you in their halo of joy and lightness. We were all to pretty to die. Except for lead guitarist, Mr. Allan James, his looks are an acquired taste. Its due to the intense concentration he brings to his craft. He is chaneling fsome next level muses up there and they use him up and ride him hard but its worth it when he manuvers that skateboard full of swithches and cables with his foot while the magic pours out of the speakers. And the songbirds are clearly some gods choir and he wasn't ready to take them back just yet to whatever universe of harmony they came from.
I was clearly and instrument of someones master plan that night
Thursday, December 2, 2010
"Dexter, Get Down!" are words no heterosexual man has ever uttered until just now. History has been made. Or has it?
"Bad kitty no no nooooo."
So the new tenant must be seriously gay. Which is a shame, because it smells like he smokes some fine herb in there, across the hall and down seven steps. I was wishing for a new "bud buddy", not a new buddy of the butt, if you know what I mean, hmm, hmmm, hmmm.
Life is funny that way, throwing you just enough rope to hang yourself with. but the question is will the rope hold this time? Twisting in the wind one day, exultant the next, this roller coaster mood swing lifestyle is not fot the timid.
You really have to try hard not to get jobs, gebius that you are. You are the most qualified slacker in the city my man. It feels like writing is becoming my job, all I'm hinking about ths imonth is words and cards. Sorry ladies, soon I will blossom, possibly before spring.....
but anyway if words are how i spend my time then id better be creating a product other than this fucking blog now hadnt i?
Watch me sink into a morass of intoxicating beverages and smokeable luxury. This is life the way I want to do it. Watch me stupfy my once brilliant mind for you, my imagined audience. I imagine I could sell alot of newspapers in a bar somewhere until they told me not to anymore......but then maybe i find a bar that wants the notorious drunk writer guy to drink at their bar...which is HOW WE GOT TO PAGE THREE...
My drinking schedule.....i'm posting up at the following establishments with these particular drink specials.....
"Bad kitty no no nooooo."
So the new tenant must be seriously gay. Which is a shame, because it smells like he smokes some fine herb in there, across the hall and down seven steps. I was wishing for a new "bud buddy", not a new buddy of the butt, if you know what I mean, hmm, hmmm, hmmm.
Life is funny that way, throwing you just enough rope to hang yourself with. but the question is will the rope hold this time? Twisting in the wind one day, exultant the next, this roller coaster mood swing lifestyle is not fot the timid.
You really have to try hard not to get jobs, gebius that you are. You are the most qualified slacker in the city my man. It feels like writing is becoming my job, all I'm hinking about ths imonth is words and cards. Sorry ladies, soon I will blossom, possibly before spring.....
but anyway if words are how i spend my time then id better be creating a product other than this fucking blog now hadnt i?
Watch me sink into a morass of intoxicating beverages and smokeable luxury. This is life the way I want to do it. Watch me stupfy my once brilliant mind for you, my imagined audience. I imagine I could sell alot of newspapers in a bar somewhere until they told me not to anymore......but then maybe i find a bar that wants the notorious drunk writer guy to drink at their bar...which is HOW WE GOT TO PAGE THREE...
My drinking schedule.....i'm posting up at the following establishments with these particular drink specials.....
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